IMPORTANT: Read every single word in this section if you are interested in becoming a patient. Any potential client who asks a question which is already dealt with on this website will be immediately blacklisted as a time waster.

 

Step 1: Vetting

 

Security and reputational vetting

Mazari Clinic is a private members club  and potential members must undergo a rigorous screening process to ensure their suitability for membership. The most important principle you must understand is that you will not be able to join anonymously.

Although we will vigorously protect patient’s anonymity to outsiders and other members, it is simply unfeasible  that we interact in such an intimate manner and environment without being 100% certain of who you are. There are several reasons for this but the most important is the security of the women working at Mazari Clinic.

Vetting includes…

• Financial: lurkers with either no intention or ability to pay fees will be excluded. Time wasters should also be aware that there is a €100 administration fee for the vetting process alone, which is non refundable should you fail.
• Reputational:  any evidence of misogyny, transphobia, racism, extreme right, are disqualifying. Also, you must not be included on any existing red flag databases run by sex workers around the world. Must pass a ten minute telephone introductory chat. Must be willing to submit a photo ID. Must be comfortable with the discrete presence of a doorman on the premises.
• Stalking: any potential client who has shown stalker-like behaviour online will be disqualified. Any person who turns up at the premises with such a history will be dealt with with extreme prejudice and be reported to the police for harassment. The Mazari Clinic doorman does not just protect personnel within the building but actively surveils the surrounding area for evidence of lurkers / stalkers.

Medical vetting

Medical vetting is a question of your trust in the staff who work at Mazari Clinic. 

• First of all, anybody who works in the field knows that certificates can be forged so you have no means of verifying the validity of any medical certificates we produce. 
• Secondly, valid certificates would have to include the actual legal names of staff which is obviously an impossibility.

Therefore, based on your knowledge of – for example Mistress Elle –  you will already have a good intuition that the Mazari Clinic is a place that is run with professionalism and integrity and that when we say staff are regularly tested. They are.

Patients do not need medical testing as nobody will be having contact with any of your bodily fluids and all penetration – wether by implement or one of the male contractors – will be strictly protected. Any client who even uses the word ‘BB’ will be permanently blacklisted.

 

Step 2: Billing & Discretion

Basically: All bills must be paid in advance at the moment you reserve your appointment. The reservation is conditional upon payment. It is at this point you will receive the full address of the Clinic.

Legal: All payments are made to a thirdparty billing service and show up as ‘Brio Linguistics Online Tutoring and Courses’.

Social: Privacy is  guaranteed. Each appointment is timed within a precision-controlled entry window, ensuring that no two clients never meet, greet, or cross paths. 

Physical: Our premises is situated in a narrow side street of Poblenou and is fronted by an unmarked black steel door with a rear exit for complete and utter discretion. We also have eyes on the street – alert for the possibility of private detectives, media or other snoopers. However,  This is not professionally guaranteed security, simply vigilance by the doorman and contact with trusted locals.

Data: once the vetting process is finished, all data is deleted; you are assigned a customer number and you will never be mentioned again in any digital system of Mazari Clinic. However, as stated, because we have to know who you are and where you come from (in case of illegal behaviour), a handwritten record of your name and identification will be kept off premises.

We will never reveal a customer’s name in a civil dispute (with spouses, employees etcetera). The written records will only be consulted in the event of serious illegal behaviour on your part, or on the request of law enforcement. 

Drugs: Neither Class A drugs nor spirits are permitted on the premises.

 

Step 3: Diagnosis & Treatment Sessions

Diagnosis: treatment cannot be decided until your exact condition is diagnosed; therefore, upon becoming a member, new patients will fill out an online form detailing their symptoms and the history of their errant behaviour. This document will form the basis of your treatment program and your one hour sessions at the clinic and whatever supplementary therapeutic materials are given for you to study and apply in your own time.

IMPORTANT: As mentioned, you do not get to choose what happens in the session! Furthermore, we do not tell you in advance what the session will entail. By visiting our website you will see more or less the kind of services we offer and the rest will be obvious. As we will have already established that your profile is perfect for Mazari Clinic, there is no risk of us surprising you with something which you will not consent to.

Predictability kills desire for all concerned. If you already know what’s going to happen in the session then you’ve already impeded one of the most erotic and exciting parts : surprise.

To conclude, you will indicate to the clinic your psychosexual history and we will take it from there.  What we can promise is that it will be better than anything you’ve had before, because we know exactly what we’re doing. Y

To proceed further send a whatsapp with your name, quick details of any experience with Mazari Clinic or a member of the Mazari Collective, and how you found out about the clinic.

Note: none of our doms manage the phone, so not only will you be wasting your time if you try to write kink. Plus, any disrespect, time wasting, weirdness over whattsap will lead to a lifetime ban.